Let's talk: New Dads Group with facilitator and founder Adam Angel

Introduction

Earlier this year, we joined forces with therapist + Dad, Adam Angel to make space for people who identify as Dad. The group quickly became active with Dads hoping to learn more about parenting styles, connect with our new and expectant dads, and find a space to be themselves. Adam is on a journey to ensure the world knows that Dads have all they need to nurture and be great parents and they too deserve a space! Below you’ll find a reflection from Adam and several testimonials from group members! Interested in the New Dads group, you can register here.

The Breastfeeding Center in collaboration with “Dads With Wisdom” just completed our first dads group this week. I created the “New Dads” group and later the “New Dads with a sibling group” to fill a void I saw in support of men as they became fathers. I personally was lacking this support when I had my now 4 year old child and even more so when we had our second child at the outset of the pandemic. When I reflected on how to create this group, I noted that my wife had signed up with a cohort of women that became a support network, a resource mine and from which she created long lasting friendships. My hopes were to create something similar for new fathers, where men could share their specific situation, ideas, and lessons in a semi-structured format so they could learn from each other and create a long lasting network. A number of the men after the first session expressed their surprise as to the comfort they felt despite their initial hesitation. Ten sessions later we closed out the group and conducted a focus group to learn what made the group work and what these dads felt they received from the group. The new dads attributed the success of the group to the formatting of the discussion, questions posed and the value of being with like-minded men who wanted to be “thoughtful dads”.

These dads felt they got a number of takeaways from the group:

● Confidence

● Stability with community in similar stage/going through similar situations/circumstances

● Ability to vent with others in similar situations

● Reassurance that I’m just another dad just trying to do his best

● Encouragement from seeing what is coming down the road

● Practical /tactical tips

● Encouragement to think about fatherhood and aspirations

● Strategies for managing relationships

I had a great time facilitating this group and look forward to continuing to support dads and connect them to one another as they begin their journey.

Sincerely,

Adam Angel

Founder of Dads With Wisdom

Testimonials from group participants

Child: Kendrix, 9months
My initial motivation was my wife to be honest. She kept suggesting the class, saying it would be good for me. So I figured why not give it a chance and it was definitely worth it. Initially when I signed up I thought it would be more like therapy and a space where I was drilled with questions about my personal life. I also do not like to talk, so I was hesitant about having to be in a space where that’s all you do. I enjoyed the break out rooms, I think that really helped with the conversations. I enjoyed the different topics and the questions to foster open communication. It was a relaxing space that didn’t put much pressure on me to talk or to come to the program in a formal way. I enjoyed just being able to be myself. The group was great because it gave me an opportunity to speak with fathers in the same position as me and I was able to have conversations that wouldn’t normally come up on a normal basis. I was also able to learn more about myself and my parenting style as well as ways to foster a better relationship with Kendrix.

- Kenn

Child: Penny (5 weeks @ start, now 14 weeks)

My wife signed me up for the group because she was able to ask advice from and swap stories with many friends who were new moms, whereas I didn't have that many new dads in my friend circles. I had some initial hesitation when I found out: I was skeptical of adding a weekly commitment on top of juggling going back to work during the newborn phase, especially as yet another videoconference after a year of increasing Zoom fatigue. I am so glad that I ended up in the group: it has turned out to be an enjoyable and valuable hour of my week. The organization of the group is great for sharing information and getting people engaged, typically alternating between broader discussions and individual one-on-one "dyads" with well thought-out questions to structure the conversation. We have laughed, shared practical tactical tips, and reflected on fatherhood. Especially as a recent first-time father, I benefited immensely from the wisdom and advice of those a few months ahead of me in their journey, and whole-heartedly recommend the experience.

- Rocky